Hey girls! Im finally back! Haha...i think this post going to be a bit emo so if u want something funny/cheerful this is nt the post>.<

Anyway i just finished up all my hall events...part of me feel sad but at the same time part of me feel happy...all the worries and responisibility and expectations all done! yet at the same time i wonder if i was really the right person for the job=(... anyway during the inter hall games (ihg) season i cried many times asking myself why i put myself through this over again?...this year i learned what it is to be in the real world...how every little move you take you need to cover your freaking ass so pppl wun have the chance to attack you...how if you let yourself be nice ppl will take advantage and use u..what ppl will do in their powers to make sure it benefits them and their parties and does not matter the meaning of conscience...how ppl can be nice in front of ur face but backstab u murder once u turned ur head away...how sometimes apparent "adults" can actually be the more childish one...sometime during the ihg i dun feel like smiling and dun feel like cheering...but i noe its my responsibility when i took up the post...i realised the world out there is damn harsh and scary...but amidst all this troubles and problems, im glad my hall mates and seniors are with me...picking me up, giving encouragement and going through it with me...ppl i never know could be that concerns showed their concerns in those small ways...

anyway currently got a few seniors enquire about the way the hall is being run and also asked about the way the merit award board winners being decide...merit award board is something like colours award in jc/sec sch given to exceptional sports players...so it fall under my portfolio and i head the committee to decide the winners...after prizes was given out...apparently there were some enquiries about how did the committee came to this winners...to me there is nothing wrong to ask about it but if you put it up on the forum, it is like you blasting me...even though i know they have no intention to do that, it hurts to see like they are doubting ur ability...is like having ur parents slapping ur face in full view of everyone at this age...i feel like i failed as a leader and failed to meet their expectations...the feeling is damn horrible and bleagh now...really keep asking myself why i let myself get into such situation...sianz...

but hopefully this feeling will pass...and it made me realised that all of us are growing up fast...we are not the same naive and innocent girls in jc we used to be...i see az suddenly so fierce from her previous post...haha..anyway im glad to always have you guys=) cos no matter what you guys wont judge me and accept me for who i am and also my strengths and weaknesses=)haha..touched rite?

ok lah..since exams so close...dun want to keep making you guys emo...so here is a pic of me to cheer you up!hahaha

Take care ppl and jia you for exams!=)

Shaz

♥Bid Farewell